Overthinking: The #1 Reason You’re Not Getting Ahead

I know a lot of people who have amazing ideas and big goals for themselves and their lives. But they aren’t getting anywhere. Months, even years go by and they are no closer to bringing those ideas to life or accomplishing the goals they set. 

On the outside looking in, it’s easy to think that they’re not serious or even that they’re lazy. But this isn’t the case. 

What really holds so many of us back is OVERTHINKING!

How do I know this? Because I am the queen of overthinking! I’m absolutely speaking from experience when I say this. And it’s something that I’m actively working on. 

But since recognizing it as a major problem for myself, I’ve been noticing it all around me. It’s a pervasive issue that holds a lot of people back from reaching their full potential and living the life they want. Myself included. 

Overthinking keeps us stuck in a bubble and discontent because deep down we want more, but can’t get out of our own heads to make it happen.

So if you find yourself constantly thinking, but not making any progress then I’m talking to you! You’re not lazy or incapable, you’re just thinking too much! Keep reading to learn why overthinking is one of your biggest barriers to success and some tips to get you out of your head and moving forward.

Me vs. My Boyfriend

My boyfriend, Aaron collects Funko Pops and decided to start a Youtube channel about this hobby. 

If you’ve never heard of Funko Pops (I hadn’t before meeting him), they’re these little bobblehead-looking figures that are made to look like characters from film and tv, sports, video games, politics and everything in between. Check out this video that I actually made an appearance in!

The idea came to him while we were traveling in Barcelona. A day or two after we got home and the jetlag settled, he made his first Youtube video using just his phone. 

Fast forward about a year and a half later, he has 7k subscribers (on a pretty niche channel), has monetized his channel, has gotten sponsorships, has fans supporting him and sending gifts, has made friends across the country, and has been invited to conventions. So much has come from him taking that first step and getting started. 

And I can tell you for a fact, he did not put a lot of thought into it, at least not at first. Yet he’s been able to grow and evolve to where he is now. 

Now let’s talk about me...

I had the idea to start a blog in 2017. Did I start right away? No.  

Instead, I spent endless hours researching and brainstorming. What’s the best platform? What’s my niche? What’s the best blogging theme? What should I write about? What should I call it? 

I spent so much time thinking about the blog that it took me months to write and publish my first blog post. And when I finally did, I didn’t advertise or tell many people. I just dipped my toe in the water, instead of diving in. 

In the following year, I put out a few blog posts, but never remained consistent. And to show you the extent of my overthinking...I even purchased a blogging course that further supported my overthinking and delayed me actually doing the work, i.e. writing and publishing blog posts. 

Fast forward to today, I am finally consistent with blogging. I'm sharing my posts and getting some traction with it. But I can’t help but wonder where I would be if I had just gone all in three years ago with my blog. Who knows where I’d be.  

But one thing I do know is I would have learned a heck of a lot more than I did filling up Pinterest boards with blogging tips and even taking a course! 

So who would you rather be in this scenario, Aaron or me??

The Problem With Overthinking

Let’s first talk about thinking versus overthinking. Just to be clear, I would never suggest jumping into something without taking the time to think it through. Thinking in the form of brainstorming, planning, problem-solving, and reflecting is a crucial first step in anything you want to pursue. 

In the short-term, thinking is extremely beneficial. You gain new ideas, perspectives, and insights. It’s an energizing process. It creates excitement and inspiration, fosters creativity, promotes innovation, builds confidence, and ultimately increases your chances of success. 

But in the long-term, prolonged thinking does the opposite. It becomes de-energizing. All the planning and researching becomes draining, stressful and anxiety-producing. This is overthinking. 

You’ve heard of analysis paralysis? The more you analyze a situation, the more overwhelmed you become by all the possible options and outcomes, and the less likely you are to make a decision and move forward. 

This is the biggest problem with overthinking. It keeps you from taking action and delays your progress. It’s no surprise that overthinking goes hand in hand with procrastination. 

This cycle is counterproductive because taking action (actually doing that thing you keep thinking about) is where you end up learning the most. Overthinking just delays the real, hands-on learning which is both valuable and necessary.

Ultimately, when you overthink, you’re jeopardizing your success because the more you think, and plan, and research, the less likely you are to ever take that first step to get started!

Why You’re Overthinking

There are many surface-level reasons you might be overthinking and stuck in analysis paralysis. But when it comes down to it, the root of it all is fear. 

And know that there’s nothing wrong with that. It’s completely normal to be fearful of the unknown when preparing to try something new. But it’s important to be aware of it. Once you recognize your fear and where it’s coming from, you can tackle it head-on.

According to Jay Shetty, there are four main sources of fear:

• fear of failure,
• fear of not meeting expectations,
• fear of a lack of ability, and
• fear of regret. 

Thinking about myself and my blog, I had a lot of fear coming from all of these sources:

Fear of failure - What if it didn’t work out? What if no one reads it?

Fear of expectations - What if my blog didn’t look as professional as all the other blogs I was reading?

Fear of ability - What if my writing skills weren’t up to par?

Fear of regret - What if it ends up being a waste of time? Then again, what if I don’t do it and miss out on a great opportunity?

These were some of the thoughts that were going through my mind at the time. A lot of “what if” that were all rooted in fear. And these thoughts kept me stuck, constantly seeking out more information so I could feel prepared and less scared to get started. 

Think about which of these four sources is affecting you and holding you back from taking real action. 

How to stop overthinking

If you’re a chronic overthinker (like I tend to be), the habit can be hard to break. But if you’re willing to get a little uncomfortable, do some inner work, and be open to challenges, you don’t have to let overthinking hold you back from success. To stop overthinking, here’s what you need to do:

Dissect your fears

We talked about the four main sources of fear. Ask yourself, what are you afraid of? And dig deep to uncover where the fear is coming from. Spend some time dissecting your fears so that you fully understand what’s causing you to ruminate and remain stagnant. 

I recommend journaling or writing down your thoughts on this in some format. Writing allows you to better process and organize your thoughts and feelings. Or talk through your thoughts with someone you trust.

Here are some questions to consider:

• How is fear affecting my behavior?
• What feelings or experiences am I trying to avoid by not taking action on my goals?
• Which of the four sources of fear is affecting me the most?
• Where does this fear come from?
• Have I experienced this fear in other situations?
• Is this fear rational?
• If I didn’t have this fear, what would I do?

Once you have a deep understanding of where your fears are coming from, the next step is to rationalize them.  

Here’s an example:

Let’s say you want to start a side-hustle selling jewelry, but you don’t believe you have the time to commit to it right now. Instead, you spend your free time researching jewelry designs, reading about other jewelry businesses, watching Youtube videos about entrepreneurship, etc. You say you don’t have time, but you are spending the time you do have thinking and learning about it. What’s really going on? 

Maybe you’re worried about your skill level; maybe you’re concerned that if you spend the little time you have and it doesn’t work out it’ll have been a waste; maybe you're scared that no one will buy your jewelry and it will be a total flop. 

These are just a few examples of the different types of fears that can come into play. 

Let’s say you fear that no one will buy your jewelry. To rationalize this fear, question why you think that. What evidence do you have that no one will buy? (None.) How can you find out whether anyone will buy it? (Try and see). 

Questions like these allow you to challenge your fearful thinking and bring you into a more logical headspace where you can make sound decisions. 

Create a deadline

Remember planning is essential. You have to take the necessary time to flesh out your idea, understand any constraints, and develop a plan of action. However, without any deadline, the planning phase could go on forever!

Have you ever heard of Parkinson’s Law? “Work expands so as to fill the time available for its completion.” This is very true. If you give yourself a month to research a jewelry vendor, for example, it’ll take you a month. If you give yourself a week, it’ll take a week.

The more time you give yourself to think and plan, the longer it will take you, and the more likely you are to cross over into overthinking territory. 

I’m the kind of person that works better under pressure. I need to have a deadline prompting me to get things done. Setting a deadline for yourself is a very effective way to combat overthinking. If you know you have to take action by a certain date, then you are going to be much more focused, targeted, and productive with your planning and preparation. 

Even better, make your deadline official. Write it on your calendar, post it on the fridge, tell friends or family about it. You could even recruit an accountability partner to help you stay on track. 

Whatever it is you commit to, make sure it’s reasonable. If you don’t know anything about jewelry, giving yourself a week to start your whole business is unrealistic and will only lead to frustration. Always try to give yourself easy wins so that you are encouraged to keep moving forward.

Start before you’re ready

Most of the time we overthink because we don’t feel prepared. We don’t think we have what it takes yet. Whether it’s having the knowledge, the skills, the network, the talent, the (fill in the blank).  

There’s an element of self-doubt that comes with overthinking. And we assume that we need to overcome that self-doubt in order to get started on our goals. That we need to wait until we have enough knowledge, skills, network, etc to move forward. 

You’re probably thinking to yourself, you’re just not ready. 

But let me tell you a little secret: being ready is a myth. You’re never going to be 100% ready for anything in life. No matter how much learning and researching you do, you can’t avoid the unexpected. You don’t even know what you don’t know. You will learn the most through your own experience and active engagement in whatever it is you want to do. 

I’ve learned so much more about blogging by actually blogging. And I build more comfort and confidence the more I do it. 

When you start before you’re ready, as hard and uncomfortable as it may feel, you slowly remove self-doubt because you’re giving yourself the chance to prove (to yourself) that you can do it. And even when challenges arise, you see that you can handle them. You start to trust yourself and increase confidence in your abilities. 

Pushing yourself to take action, even when you don’t quite feel ready is one of the best ways to get out of your head and stop overthinking.

As you can see, overthinking is a major obstacle to accomplishing your goals and fulfilling your biggest dreams. It creates a lot of unneeded stress and anxiety and holds us back from living the life we really want. And this stress and dissatisfaction can trickle down and affect other areas of life, compromising our overall well-being. If you’re interested in working on reducing feelings of overwhelm and stress so you can finally make progress on your goals, I’d love to help! Click here to schedule a free 30 min Strategy Session.

How to Increase Productivity During Challenging Times

The week following the murder of George Floyd was a blur. I was wrapped up in the news footage, media reporting, and social media commentary for days on end. It was tiring, it was stressful, it was upsetting, it was encouraging. A roller coaster ride of emotions that you may have experienced as well. 

I found it almost impossible to focus long enough to be productive and make real progress on the goals and tasks I had set. I was mentally exhausted and my mind was racing with all the information I was processing in such a short amount of time.

I must say, I’m so encouraged by all of the outcry and the shifts that we are already seeing in this fight for justice and racial equity. I think it’s amazing the way that some individuals, brands, and companies have become advocates and are speaking out, protesting, conversing, learning, and making policy changes.   

I believe these things are essential for creating a world that is not only fair but safe for us all to live in. And I think getting involved in whatever way you see fit is important, whether that’s out on the frontlines protesting or having meaningful conversations at home. 

However, we also can’t lose track of our own purpose and goals. We still have to find a way to get stuff done and continue moving forward, even in the current climate that we’re in. 

It was difficult for me to muster up the energy and motivation to work at the same pace I was before these recent events. But I knew I had to continue building my health coaching business, putting out helpful content, and showing up fully present for my clients.

If you, like me, have been having trouble getting back into the swing of things with everything that’s going on in the world right now, I have a few tips to help you increase your productivity in a healthy, balanced way. Whether you’re working a 9-5 job, are an entrepreneur, have a side-hustle, or are working on a passion project, these tips will help you feel more motivated, present and effective while you work.

1. Give yourself time to process

A lot is happening right now and it may affect all of us differently. But it does affect us in some way and it’s important to acknowledge that. Giving yourself the time and space to process how you’re feeling and make sense of what you’re experiencing will cut down on the mental noise that’s blocking your concentration. 

Some people’s first response to challenging times such as these is to dive deeper into their work to avoid what’s going on externally. This kind of forced productivity isn’t helpful and can lead to burnout. You have to work harder because you’re not fully present and won’t produce your best work as a result. 

I can’t recommend enough to take time for reflection as it helps to clear your head and allow you to focus on a task without distracting thoughts and feelings constantly coming up.

Some ways to do this are journaling, meditating, or talking with someone you trust.

I’ve found journaling to be particularly useful in allowing me to get all my thoughts down on paper and out of my head. Otherwise, I tend to ruminate on things that are bothering me and it makes it hard to focus on other tasks I have to do.

2. Limit exposure to triggering content

It’s hard to turn on the news or log into social media without being exposed to emotionally-charged content about the current social/political/racial turmoil. There’s nothing wrong with staying informed and engaging in discussion.  

However, it can quickly become information overload and start to affect your peace of mind. And it’s very hard to get things accomplished in this frame of mind.

I found myself feeling overwhelmed and mentally exhausted by all that I was watching and reading. To the point where I was developing headaches from scrolling through my Instagram feed. As much as I wanted to keep up with the newest developments, I quickly realized that staying glued to my phone or TV wasn’t supporting my mental health or productivity. 

Setting boundaries around what types of content I was consuming, how much time I spent on social media, and even the conversations I was having with others helped me to protect my energy and focus on other things besides the latest controversy. 

3. Turn down your stress response

When we are experiencing a stressful event that brings about feelings like worry, fear, anxiety, or anger, the body interprets this as a threat and activates your stress response.  

You are now in fight or flight mode where all of your resources (blood, oxygen, and energy) are sent to the areas that are needed to help you battle or escape what your body believes to be a dangerous situation.  

Your body is no longer focused on giving you the brainpower you need to finish the tasks on your to-do list.

Additionally, staying in this state is taxing on both the body and mind. Prolonged periods of stress can cause physical symptoms like headaches, stomach aches, muscle tension and body aches, and psychological symptoms like anxiety, brain fog, and lack of concentration. All of which make it extremely challenging to focus and get things done. 

You want to get your body out of fight or flight mode and into a state of rest and recovery. This is where your body returns to its normal state and you can function at your best.

To do this you want to do calming activities that allow you to slow down your breathing and give your body the feeling of safety and security.  

Some relaxing activities to try are: 

• Deep breathing exercises
• Meditation and mindfulness practices
• Light exercise, like yoga or a walk in nature
• Aromatherapy 

4. Create a schedule

It’s very easy to get off task and go down a rabbit hole of social media scrolling or news binging. Creating a schedule for how you want to structure your day is a useful way to avoid this and increase productivity. 

This is a strategy that I started using weeks ago and has proven very effective at keeping me focused and on task, especially right now where there are so many things taking up my attention. 

I use Google Calendar to time block my days. That is, writing down when and for how long I’m going to work on each task for the day. I include my work tasks, meals, and other activities I want to do that day.  

You can do this on any calendar app, a planner, or a blank sheet of paper. The important part is to make it realistic, something that you can stick to. And don’t forget to schedule your breaks throughout the day. Downtime is just as important as work time. 

Having my tasks written down helps trick my mind into staying on schedule and getting more done. Of course, it’s not always perfect, and sometimes I get off track. But I’ve found that reminding myself of what I want to do and designating time to do it, helps me actually get it done. 

5. Go easy on yourself

Beating yourself up about not getting enough done or being distracted or not measuring up to your usual standards isn’t productive. Things that are going on around you, in your own life, in your community, country or the world do have an effect on you. You’re not a robot. Things that you see and experience impact you. And it’s unreasonable to expect things to go right back to normal right away.

Remember everyone’s different. Different things affect different people in different ways. Comparing yourself and your level of productivity to someone else is also counterproductive. It doesn’t get you any closer to checking off your to-do list or achieving your goals. 

Be patient and gentle with yourself. The more you push and force yourself to be productive the more likely you are to feel burnt out and the less you’re likely to get accomplished. 

Productivity is important because we all have a unique job to do in this world, no matter what industry you’re in. However, creating a balance of work and downtime that allows you to process all the thoughts and emotions that may arise is essential. These tips have helped me find a healthy balance of staying informed, prioritizing my mental health, and getting work done. And I know they will help you too!

If you’re interested in learning more about managing stressful situations and remaining productive this is something that I work with clients on one-on-one. I would love to discuss a plan for you in a Stress Less Strategy Session. Book your free call here.